Hey, so I’ve noticed that a lot of the issues I’ve struggling with throughout my have been from this feeling of abject loneliness. It came about from an experience I had when I was five and my mom left me at school for the first time. It was a traumatic experience for me and left a profound impact on me.
This feeling has always been there, under the radar, but I felt the profound loneliness again when I took mushrooms. I felt like I was all alone in the universe, and even more that nobody cared for me or was there for me. The way my brain made sense of it at the time is that it started believing this reality wasn’t a real reality, but a fictitious one made up by the real me’s head. I now believe that was a coping mechanism of a story to deal with the profound sense of loneliness and isolation I had been feeling.
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I know logically technically I am alone in the world, but there are people there for me that do have my back and are there for me. However, there’s still this “blocked emotion” that’s stuck in the past and I want to try and release.
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I want to try and release it by finding a solid book that explores this topic of feeling alone in the world. Like completely, and utterly alone. I was hoping for a non-fiction book backed with science, but I’d also be open to fiction if anyone reads my post and is like, “YES…THIS! is what you need.”
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Thank you
by Khajiit_Boner