I just finished reading verity and this gives me the ick

So i read verity and I think it is a great book but with a few plotholes and some parts didn't really connect. But overall the reading experience was amazing.

Something i couldn't really connect with was Lowen's character, like I know everybody would be curious to know about the family where very painful mishaps has taken place but what really gives me the ick is she developing feelings for a married man who is "devotedly" taking care of his paralysed or brain dead wife. Let's keep apart the fact that verity was not the mother as per the manuscript and take the letter as the ending. Then Lowen, a complete stranger to the family gave the idea to kill verity and how can she live her life guilt free with Jeremy after reading that letter. I have read a few books where the protagonist is a writer and the story would definitely be fucked up. The things that goes in the mind of the writers are crazy, so there could be a chance that the letter might be true and she wrote in the manuscript was her writing exercise
And another thing which I felt weird was when Jeremy said that, he didn't really had a deep feeling or connection for verity but he proposed to marry her still, like I mean dude shouldn't you think twice about your feelings before getting into something deep like marriage. And then he finds deep connection with Lowen all of a sudden.

Also I loved certain parts where verity would stare at Lowen and how she waved at crew, those parts were really creepy and gave me the chills.
Anyway I just wanted to vent out after completing the book.