i have never been more unhappy in my life and i need an escape

Hi everyone,

I’ve been lurking on this subreddit for a while, and I figured it was finally time to post. I’ve been feeling unbelievably depressed these past few months. I moved last September to attend my dream university, only to find myself completely alone, miserable, and doing terribly in my classes. It’s been disorienting to realize I got everything I thought I wanted, and still feel so profoundly unsatisfied and unfulfilled.

I’ve been searching for some kind of escape, and I’d really appreciate any recommendations you might have. I’ll admit—I’m kind of picky, though I haven’t read much in the past few years. I’m looking for fiction that isn’t super difficult to read (this is strictly for pleasure and I’m already drowning in school), but that still has really complex characters. I loved The Secret History, and while I know it’s a very problematic book, I was also really moved by A Little Life. what I loved about them was the way they captured these deeply flawed, brilliant characters and placed them in intimate, often morally gray friendships. The writing was also gorgeous—lyrical and thoughtful

I’m really craving are incredibly complex characters with big, messy lives—characters who feel so fully realized that you could swear they actually exist. I want books where you get to know them deeply: their contradictions, their longings, their darkest moments, and their brightest ones too. I’m also looking for something with a well-thought-out, layered plot—something that feels deliberate and intricate, where the events unfold in a way that makes you think everything matters. I’m not necessarily looking for fast-paced action, but I want to feel immersed in a story that’s smart, emotionally intense, and deeply human.

I love that feeling of reading something that makes you feel like you’re part of this intense, insular group of friends, even when they’re doing terrible things. Books that articulate feelings you’ve had your whole life but never knew how to say out loud. Books that make you feel seen, but also completely unravel your worldview.

Bonus points if it’s NOT set in New York. I associate the city with the worst six months of my life and would love a change of scenery—something immersive and different, somewhere I can get completely lost.

Honestly, I just need something to live for right now, so I’ll take any and all suggestions.

Thank you.