I am “generation Harry Potter” (and please, I really do not wish to discuss JK Rowling right now). What I mean is that I was just the right age when the books where first published and I grew up with them being a few years younger than the protagonists.
Now I did not have the most ideal childhood. My home situation was complicated and I was home alone a lot. I also was a sickly child and had to stay home from school often. I did not get much but I wish for a new book every now and then and when I was home alone because of a tonsilitis my mom bought me Harry Potter. I was 9.
Since then HP somehow became my comfort zone, my safe space. Whenever I felt like shit I would hole up in my room and read through the HP books. As a teen I never told anyone since I already understood it was weird to read a book again and again to flee from reality. But I figured it will phase out once I am an adult and “figured stuff out”.
Well, it didn’t. You can guess how old I am given the above information and through all my 20’s and then 30’s til now I kept turning to the HP books whenever something bad happened. Especially something grief and death related.
Yesterday my grandmother died completely unexpectedly (I mean, she was old but she was relatively well until now and she was out for a coffe and cake and then dinner the day before yesterday with my parents even. Sudden fatal heart attack not even 24 hours later. I missed the chance to see her again after months of not visiting. We had planned a day together on Dec 1st. I am incredibly sad and full of guilt).
I took off of work today and now I am at home, sudden crying outbursts all the time and it’s like my whole body and mind scream for my personal method of “relief”: Lay in bed with a hot cup of tea and HP and the sorcerers stone and just nope out of real life. I know this is not healthy and a little weird but it helps me so much.
I just wanted to know if others know this feeling as well… and what your comfort book and story is.
by Susannah_Mio_
8 Comments
Absolutely. For me it’s LoTR. My older brother introduced me to Tolkien when I was in 5th grade, at the beginning of a period in my life I didn’t like very much. I’ve returned to the series over and over again, it feels like coming home.
Me too! Loved those times.
HP books are like Apple iPhones before, you need to make a reservation or you need to fall in line at the time of book release.
I’m really sorry about your grandmother. Please try not to feel guilty though – it sounds like she was in good health and there’s no way you could’ve known what was going to happen.
I don’t think it’s weird or unhealthy to use books to help you escape the real world for a bit. I’m absolutely biased here because it’s my preferred coping mechanism too – but hey, there are much worse ways of coping!
For me the books that I loved to re-read were Tamora Pierce’s books and all of the Anne of Green Gables books.
I’m glad you’re doing something that brings you some comfort and I hope you’re starting to feel better soon.
I’m in my late 30s, and Harry Potter was like that for me too, for a long time. I would rarely read a new book, and instead I’d reread the HP series, and occasionally The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. These I would do more or less yearly. I knew I liked them and I’d always pick up something I had missed before.
PS – my condolences on your loss.
For me it’s still the hunger games books, i reread them every year.
I am so sorry for your grandmother.
Mine is The hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy.
It used to be Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire though.
It is perfectly healthy to grieve in bed, with a book. When my dad suddenly passed away, I reread all the Moomin books. In Finland we call this “surutyö”, literally “grief work” – you do what you can to cope mentally and emotionally with the loss and everything involved with it. It is a part of the healing process.
My Enid Blytons, mostly.