I've been trying to find a book that speaks to a sort of specific personal situation. I've looked online and at large bookstores like Powell's but I'm struggling to find something that… Fits.
Short version: my father (who by all accounts was a pretty solid father), after retiring from a fairly successful career, began using meth, and engaging in extramarital affairs. In some ways I guess you could say he lived a double life or second life for about a decade, before it came out and my parents separated.
I don't quite know if a book that shares this sort of experience exists? I've looked at books about grief, but they don't quite fit — there's a loss, but it's not a death. It's different. I've looked at some books about parents of adult children getting divorced, but again that's only a small part of the situation. And in some ways is sort of least confusing part.
Any suggestions would be welcome. Thanks.
by HumGonzoop
1 Comment
Ehh I’m not sure it’s close enough to what you’re looking for but just throwing it out there. Banana Yoshimoto’s Moshi Moshi is technically about the main character losing her father, but other than actually grieving his death the book also focuses a bit on the circumstances and reconciling with the idea that her loving and beloved father died the way he did: in a suicide pact with a woman he turned out to be having an affair with. (Not spoiling anything lol don’t worry, this is literally stated in the blurb on the back of the book) Definitely not the same, and I’m so sorry you’re going through such a difficult experience, I can’t imagine what that must feel like. My other tentative suggestion is Shuggie Bain by Douglas Stuart, it’s a bit of a depressing book lol (Moshi Moshi is wonderfully hopeful and helped me tons when my dad died and I was feeling very lost but that’s quite different of course, like you yourself said!) but very well written, and about a boy growing up and dealing with his mother’s alcoholism and affairs and watching her go back to drinking even after promising & doing her best to get sober which is also a kind of grief. I don’t know if either of these speak to you, but I do hope you find something to read that brings you some comfort 🫂