I grew up in a social/ collectivist society where you have to be a semi-slave to your parents and then the ones around you. I always hated going to social events since i was around 10 years or something, but ive been pushed to this hell by my parents and everyone around me even though they knew that i hate it.
If you are going to say no, then you are not a good person, you arent masculine and you dont want to go because you have no strong personality etc….. you will be looked down to.
Not to mention my narcissist father who wants everyone to be a copy of him, nor my mother who thinks that her job is to satisfy this narcissist or she will go to the hell, nor the whole society that thinks saying no to your parents is your ticket for your seat in the hell even if it is purely your business(I dont believe in this bullshit).
I just got tired of trying to explain so i hope you got it
by Syndrome7
2 Comments
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C Gibson.
It puts words on that guilt, the pressure, and the feeling that you exist to manage other peoples emotions. It also gives practical ways to set boundaries without getting pulled into fights.
If you want something even more direct on saying no, read Set Boundaries Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab.
Maybe, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. Can’t remember the author right now tho.