“Clean-ish” fantasy book recommendations

*In writing this needlessly long post, I ironically (maybe this is the proper way to use the word?) made this post a little NSFW and mentioned light spoilers for the first hour and a half of American Gods…*

Before you comment, please hear me out. I am an adult. I am not a puritan, I have a healthy relationship with sex. I don't flinch every time I hear a curse word. I just prefer my books to have… Less. My problem is when I spend money on a book or spend time putting on on hold, anticipating it, check it out and the amount of swearing and smut makes it hard for me to focus on the story.

All I want is some recommendations with a little less. For reference, I really wanted something to listen to something and I didn't have time to do an in depth search so I just picked a recommendation and did no research whatsoever… American Gods. It wasn't a bad book, it seemed quite interesting, but I got about an hour and a half in before I had had enough. I even made it past the vagina swallowing sex worship scene although it did contribute to my lack of interest in the book. All the F bombs and talk about taking a piss were just a little distracting to me (piss especially for some reasons bothers me… like, not even when said as "piss me off", just when it refers to urine. like, do you feel more manly when you say to have to "take a piss"? It just feels unnecessarily but entirely intentionally crass. like the person needed to pee but wanted an opportunity to make themselves sound mature and gritty, or manly, depending on how they identify).

Furthermore (wow that sound pretentious but I'm keeping it in 'cause I can't think of a more accurate word.), I enjoyed YA books a lot when I was a kid and still sometimes reread or pick up a new one (e.g Warriors, Wings of Fire, Eragon, Harry Potter), I have just found recently that it is hard to find a "clean" (for lack of a better word, not a judgement) fantasy book that isn't very obviously aimed at teenage readers (simple dialogue, shallow plot and lore).

I read a lot as a teen (the aforementioned books as an example) and then stopped as I became an adult and didn't have as much time for reading. Now I have four kids and have been trying to get back into reading via audiobooks because what working mother has hours to sit and read a book. I started my adult reading journey with the Cosmere and was absolutely spoiled because it is amazing and lore rich and mature without being needlessly smutty or vulgar. Then I went on to try reading other fantasy books… and have not had good luck.

I'm so sorry if this sounds offensive to anyone who has these tastes, I am not judging, it's just not what I'm looking for when I read!

All this is to say that I am looking for fantasy book recommendations and maybe a site or resource that lays out how vulgar or pornagraphic a book is so I can stop wasting my time and money.