Books similar to my dark Vanessa & All the ugly and wonderful things

These two books really stuck with me. They were disturbing, but also I couldn’t stop reading them and they both evoked so much emotion out of me. I’m actually typically a thriller / horror reader specifically, yet these were my top 2 reads of the year last year. I was hoping to find something similar, that’s shocking and disturbing but not just gross, with actual meaning and makes you feel something.