I approached ‘1984’ by Orwell completely blind. Now I just finished it and need to share (*Spoilers*)

I had a very small idea of what this book was about. I just kept seeing it as an all-time classic, or on lists of ''a hundred books to read before you die''.

It started off with a few pages every day, it didn't really hook me in, but it wasn't unpleasant to read either. I quickly pictured an ending where the protagonist joins a rebellion and overthrows the Party. Boy does this story take a turn when he gets captured.

Winston's journey during the weeks (or months) of torture that follow was simply mind-blowing to read. I'm not huge on 'dark' content, but I was in trance, with a morbid curiosity on where this was going, with everything that he was put through. His own vulnerability and suffering, constantly increasing towards O'Brien who just has this perfect, brain-washed rhetoric at every corner. As a reader, I found myself arguing with O'Brien's logic, but he is so far deep in the Party Hive mind/doublethink, you can’t help but to think he’s impossible to reason with. But it’s more complex than just talking to a stubborn individual; his presence, his gospel, the scientific/psychological approach to the process, the whole ‘teacher to a promising student’ dynamic makes their conversations twisted to a degree I can’t explain. It was terrifying and fascinating at the same time to see an ideology pushed to its extremes. Winston (and myself) tries to see a flaw in everything he says, but O’Brien has an answer – as crazy at it was – to all of it. He is this benevolent guide, and the face of evil at the same time.

I’m sure this book reaches people on so many intellectual layers – and I hope I didn’t butcher the essence of it with my explanation – but that read was really eye opening. I was half hoping the whole torture arc was a test to join the Brotherhood, but I guess O’Brien was the real deal.

Thanks for reading me!