Sooo many 'self help' books out there, I don't wanna have to wade though 5 books I could have written myself to find one with actual useable insight.
I'm dealing with a devastating loss. I'm trying to cope but I am failing tbh. Are you aware of any books on this subject which you could recommend, which actually provide some insight and/or advice I may find to be ACTUALLY helpful? The one's I've grabbed so far are just generic cookie cutter shit like "stay busy". I'm looking for something with practical advice, more in the realm of science than religion. Something that goes deeper into the concepts of grief/loss, and how to deal with it, or look at it differently, or something, which can actually help guide my emotions to a better place on this subject. Something based on real and tested coping skills, written by someone competent in the field; not just superficial lists of things to keep busy with, or whatever.
I need to understand this place better than I do, and nothing has been helpful so far. I'm sure some exist, but the ones I've tried are just slop, or have heavy religious vibes; which just doesn't hit it for me. I need to learn some better 'coping skills' here, or something.
Can you recommend something you've found helpful in such a situation?
by brendafiveclow
4 Comments
Jostein Gaarder’s “Hello? Is Anybody There?” is a novella that centers around a young girl at home, being cared for by her family as she is dying of cancer. Almost the entire book is of her thoughts as she listens to her family moving around downstairs, interspersed with conversations she has with a young angel who frequently visits her. It is very heartwarming, given the sadness of the family.
Edit: The book isn’t religious. More spiritual and philosophical.
I’m not a self help book reader. But, after the loss of my dad (for whom I was a caregiver for 13 years) I was not doing well. I heard good things about “It’s OK that you’re not OK” by Megan Devine. It vastly helped me. Shoot, it helped me process trauma from my cancer crap. It’s my go to recommendation.
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Joan Didion’s Year of Magical Thinking is a good one.
Crying in H Mart, any of Caitlin Doughty’s books.