Book suggestions to overcome perfectionism, an obsession with productivity, and not knowing how to ‘have fun.’

Hi. I am constantly finding myself frustrated by feelings of ‘not having enough time’ or ‘my time being wasted,’ and I think it stems from a serious obsession with both productivity and perfectionism. I need to constantly be checking something off a to do list to feel value, and of COURSE things must be done the ‘right way.’ In other words, I have a never ending to do list and everything on it must be done very well or perfectly. The second I ‘complete’ a more immediate to do list, I’m again on the hunt for something and shift focus to longer term projects. (For example… House is clean —-> organization could be better. Organized? —-> Better start repainting and redecorating. Better home —-> the garden needs work. Better home AND garden —-> I really need to work on my friendships, better start writing letters.) This leaves me constantly feeling overwhelmed. It’s not because I ENJOY doing these things, it’s based in some fear of not doing or being enough. We call it ‘moving the goalposts’ in my house. Any reason to feel insufficient is enough. When I do get to the end of a day and find that my short term list is completed, I am so uncomfortable I can’t stop thinking about what I SHOULD be doing next, and I have a hard time relaxing and enjoying the moment. When I’m asked ‘well what do you WANT to do?’ It’s more or less just ‘find another project’, even though I don’t get joy out of it, it’s just an impending sense of obligation, I think because I’m not sure where exactly to derive self-worth otherwise. I legitimately do not know how to have fun even if I block off time to do so. It’s like I have no identity outside of ‘duty,’ in any of its various forms.

You get the picture. Any books you’ve found helpful for this sort of situation?