I have been feeling lost lately, in relationships, university, and even in how I connect with people in general.
I am curious about many things, and I want to grow, but I often struggle with the feeling that I am not good enough to fully commit to anything.
Recently I went through a breakup with a situationship that lasted around 6 months and it hit harder than I expected. She told me she thought about our relationship and she does not feel like seeing anybody as she is very busy…
Shortly after I found out that she was already back on dating apps. This forced me to confront a lot of emotions, not just her but the fact that my life could have been so much better if I just wasn't so "special" lol.
I don't see my self as the average chill guy in how I experience the world. In social settings, especially bars and similar gatherings, I feel extremely uncomfortable with the dynamics, like when people engage with me only to get access to my female friends, or when conversations feel forced because we happen to be in the same room. It just feels frustrating when life in general feels transactional or insincere.
I feel lost in life. I don't want to feel sorry for myself anymore and build resilience and grow into someone more grounded and self assured.
I am looking for a book that challenges perspective, that encurages self-discipline, self-knowledge and strength without bitterness. A book that pushes you to accept reality and step up, rather than retreat. However I don't want to read a book from red pill guys that just say make your bad, treat women poorly and just focus on money. Can be a novel, or a non-fiction book.
So if you have something in mind, I'd appreciate the recommendation.
by basilius61
3 Comments
My Name Is Baseball available on Amazon is about my son. I read your post with a lump in my throat. It reminded me of my son’s struggles. You are at least asking for help and for that, I commend you. My son did not want to admit he needed help and I didn’t help the situation either. I didn’t believe in mental health/depression. There are so many things I feel regret and guilt for, it breaks my heart every day. I wrote this book to help anyone, in anyway I can. If this book is not for you, it’s okay just please try to take it a day at a time. Talk to someone. Try to think of those who love you very much that may be left behind.
A Gentleman in Moscow is one of my favorite reads so far this year. It helped me appreciate the little things in life regardless of how it feels like the big picture is developing. The main character showcases a lot of the growth you’re looking for, in my opinion.
Read the Stoics. It teaches you to separate what you can control from what you can’t, and to place your energy only where it matters and has one of the most powerfull ideas: You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond