The darkest book

I’ve been looking for a book that will emotionally scar me. Is this healthy? No. But what my therapist doesn’t know won’t hurt them LOL.

I know this question gets asked so much. But I’ve looked through suggestions and I feel like the same books get suggested on Reddit and TikTok on repeat. I’ve read some but none of them really left me with that empty, hollow, wtf did I just read feeling. So I figured maybe if I tailored the question towards things I find unsettling, someone could suggest something.

We need to talk about Kevin was great- I’m looking for something like that but worse. Loved My Dark Vanessa- again… I want worse. Darker. Something that feels like a stomach punch. Reading is an outlet for me. I could use one right now.

I’m not necessarily looking for gore or horror. If it’s in the book, fine. I just want something that will make me feel emotion right now LOL.

Any recommendations on the darkest books you’ve ever read? Maybe something you couldn’t finish? TIA!