Any books for someone with a very pessimistic, anxious, fearful and negative view of the world?

Can be fiction or NF.

Feels like i’m letting life slip by on autopilot. Nothing fazes me anymore. I try to act as manly as possible, because that’s what’s expected of me. Tho deep inside, i just wanna sing, dance and be unapologetically campy. But my crippling anxiety would never allow this. To me, acting all stoic and manly is like playing life on easy mode. No real challenges, no real rewards…

I pretend as if i don’t care about what people think about me, but deep inside, it’s perhaps the thing i care about the most! The subconscious is a weird place…

by InitialLandscape