I was SA-ed as a minor twice
and I have real trouble letting it all go
I spent a huge part of 20s Obsessing over how to come out about it and it consumed me.
I want out of this loop so bad,
Its seem forgiveness is the only way but I am not there yet
I am looking for some hope, some strength, some peace
Suggest me some books please
by AvoidanceAlias
5 Comments
The power of now by Eckhart Tolle
I was also sexually assaulted. Twice. Please see a trauma therapist to help you heal. You don’t “get over” something that traumatic. EMDR gave me my life back.
The only person who needs forgiveness is probably just towards yourself. What blame or shame you have, forgive yourself. It’s not your fault.
Know My Name by Chanel Miller is a powerful memoir, she tells her own story but reclaims her identity and worth through it.
I’m really sorry but there is hope.
First, I’m very sorry this happened to you. Talking to someone professionally may be a path for you?
I have some recommendations of YA novels that deal with SA, but some of them may be triggering. Not sure. I’ll give you the list and let you decide.
**Wonder When You’ll Miss Me** by Amanda Davis – the SA is the beginning of the story and sends Faith on a journey with the circus.
**The Cutting Edge of Friendship** by Khristina Chess – the SA leads one of the character into a spiral of self-harm. The scene is graphic.
**All the Rage** by Courtney Summers – A girl is raped at a party by a boy she thought was beautiful, and then she ends up being bullied for it.
**The Female of the Species** by Mindy McGinnis – A vigilante girl seeks revenge for a rape and murder.
**The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith** – After a girl is raped in her own bed by her brother’s best friend, she goes through a long period of self-destruction before finding hope and peace.
**Girl Made of Stars** by Ashley Herring Blake – A girl is torn between believing her best friend about a rape or her twin brother, who is the accused.
**Some Boys** by Patty Blount – A girl is raped by the “golden boy” at school, and she fights against the bullying and ostracization of the school.
Every Memory Deserves Respect by Deborah Korn is a really good book on EMDR therapy which helps with processing trauma
Put Your Past in the Past by Beverly Engel has a section where the author talks about her own experience with this
The Adverse Childhood Experiences Recovery Workbook by Glenn R. Schiraldi
I’m sorry this happened to you. You can’t just let go of trauma from sexual assault. It is in your body, not just your brain. You need to go to a therapist and do EMDR therapy so that you can reprocess those experiences and put them in the past. So your body doesn’t feel like it’s about to happen to you again in your present life.